Friday, March 16, 2012

What if WCP Cup Teams Were Other Pro Sports Teams? Part 1 of 3.

Hmm. Let's take a look.

Republic of Ireland - New York Yankees

Well, that was easy. Everyone hates them, and for good reason. They simply pick the best players and go win. No one likes a winner. Never comfortable with just being good and competitive, ROI has to blow everyone out of the water. To be specific, ROI is like the Yankees of the late 90's. It's to the point where if they were to miss the final, it wouldn't really feel like the WCP Cup. Let's compare the two:

1. ROI breaks the WCP Cup trophy at the draw = The Yankees' most famous employee,  George Costanza, wrecks the World Series Trophy by dragging it around the parking lot behind his car.

2. ROI have won the WCP Cup 4 of the last 7 years = The Yankees have won 27 World Series Championships, almost 3 times more than the nearest contender.

3. ROI and their few fans are known for being large consumers of beer = Wade Boggs, while playing with the Yankees, once drank 60-70 beers on a cross-country trip to Seattle.

They're pretty much the same team.

Next up...

Laos - Boston Red Sox

If ROI are the Yankees, then Laos is most certainly the Boston Red Sox. They are most fierce rival of the Yankees, but often come up short. Still a great team, and one of the better teams to watch in the WCP Cup.
Let's compare:

1. Laos is the smallest team in the tournament = David Eckstein, a Red Sox player, is currently the shortest player in the MLB at 5'7. The shortest hall-of-famer? Former Boston player Rabbit Maranville (at 5'5).

2. Laos is known for their passionate fan base = Red Sox Nation is one of the most passionate fan base there is in sports, rivalling the passion displayed by Brazilian or Dutch soccer fans.

3. Laos winning the 2010 WCP Cup = 2004 Red Sox winning the World Series, beating the Yankees en route, and breaking a supposed "curse" after 86 years of futility.

4. Laos wears red = Red Sox wear red.

End of story.

Alright, enough with the Baseball comparisons. I'm not even a baseball fan.

Poland - Philadelphia Eagles

Poland is trendy pick to win the tournament this year. Why? Take an already good team, add a couple all-stars, and you should have a recipe for success. This one wasn't easy. There were a lot of other teams I considered comparing them to, such as Chelsea, or the Miami Heat. Much like those teams, Poland just have to gel, and they'll be a major contender for the WCP Cup title. The tools are in place, and with time, it'll happen. Let's compare the two:

Polish fans famously cheered against Laos in the final after they felt slighted in the semi-final = Philadelphia Eagle fans famously booed Santa during an Eagles half-time show, and proceeded to pelt him with snowballs.

Poland has acquired two good attacking players = The Eagles have acquired stars such as Michael Vick and Nnamdi Asomugha, hoping they'll put them over the top to win.

Bill Romanowski and Ron Jaworski, two of the more famous Eagles players, are of Polish descent.

Pizza in Poland does not contain tomato sauce. The waiters bring sauce to the table in a pitcher, and you pour it on top. Sometimes the sauce is just ketchup. = I once saw one of their defenders, let's call him Devin S., eat an entire large Domino's pizza in one sitting.


Face it, they're practically identical.

23 comments:

Anonymous said...

Your comparison of George Costanza dragging the trophy behind his car and Mike Collins breaking the trophy is priceless. This is a very well thought out article and I loved it to bits. Well done clockcleaner.

Mat Campbell

Anonymous said...

Polish fans cheered against Laos in the final because after the semi-final a prominent Laos fan yelled profanities at Polish players and called them vulgar names.

Anonymous said...

Laos vs Nigeria today at 4pm

Anonymous said...

Mike Collins will break anything if he doesn't get his way. The guy's a bit lame to be honest. Oh and one more thing, the Polish fans/players were yelling vular names back last year as well at the Laos section, so I don't know why the Polish people are making themselves look like hereos. Your all at fault, so stop talking the nonsense. Anyone at that game knew it was both sides starting crap. Other than that, I thought it was a good write up.

Anonymous said...

Laos 4 Nigeria 5 great game to watch, Laos would have a tuff time wining games if their Stoon players don't show up, but other wise great game full of running from both teams, good luck to both

Anonymous said...

I noticed the poll about what team will make it to the playoofs. What's all the hype about this Afghanistan team anyways. They keep bringing out players from all different teams during the friendly games. I also noticed these guys are going 100% out there while other teams are still making cuts and trying to pick a good roster. Don't know about them making it to the next round. A little bit annoying listening to how "AMAZING", and how "NO ONE WILL STAND IN THEIR WAY" crap at the facility after games cause some of those guys not only talk loud but talk b.s. too.

Anonymous said...

Poland is going to be awesome, probably best team in wcp as of right now and that's a fact, this could be the year we finally win it all

Anonymous said...

Poland is horrible, Afghan too

Anonymous said...

Poland STINKS. they aint winning JACK

Anonymous said...

The only team that can go pound for pound with Poland is ROI and ROI is scared of playing Poland too

Anonymous said...

Jamaica vs Nigeria tonite at 10pm come check out the new assembled jamaican team

The Joker said...

I know for a fact that those 2 teams won't win the tourney

Anonymous said...

I saw the joker walking into the rain bow club, what a fag

Anonymous said...

Afghanistan is an elite team full of very skilled players. No team will stand in our way this year. We are what we are because we have all mastered our positions with years of training. No one will get by us this year. No one!!!!!! These teams people talk about like ROI and Poland will lose and not by 1 or 2 goals, but by atleast 3 or 4. I garantee it. Afghanistan is the best. Bring it.

-Rameen Yousefi

Anonymous said...

The fees associated with this tournament is a joke. If we have no beer, it's even more of a joke.

I would also like to add, that I see all these RSA employees sitting around on facebook and youtube at the front desk when they could be cleaning up our gross change rooms. It's not sanitary at all and they smell really bad. Like come on. The other day these RSA employees didn't even move the nets or anything.

Why are we paying so much money for these idiots to sit around and do nothing. They also complain when they do work. People pay good money. Get off your asses and do some work.

The whole RSA is a joke and run terribly.

Garanteed more than just myself agree with this. We need new people in and the old people who run this organization OUT.

Anonymous said...

Somebody is full of shit! They write on all blogs and pretend to be somebody else in order to get people hate each other! Get a life idiot!

Anonymous said...

rainbow is one word, and if you saw him walking into rainbow, why were u there? and who is he or she? lol

Anonymous said...

Riley when are u doing part 2and 3? This is too old

Anonymous said...

To: Anonymous (March 22, 2012 5:33PM)

Can you please shut up. You're probably one of the guys copying and pasting on all the blogs. Clearly you check all the blogs idiot because how else would you know. Nice try though ... Some guys are so obvious. Lame.

Julio

Anonymous said...

Hey Julio aka Jufus you should maybe learn to shut up yourself because your chirp your noise on every blog. Hypocrite.

Just so everyone knows, this Jufus guy used to play on ES which he claimed was the best team. He is now on Ireland and has changed his tune. Apparantely Ireland is the best team now and he is a superior defender compared to others.

What a bunch of b.s. He floods Collins WCP CUP BLOG 2 with alot of NOISE.

Anonymous said...

I'm baffled why every one wants to try to be like Julio yet no one actually can do their own thing. Blatantly fake Julio post you allowed Riley.

Anonymous said...

To anonymous bashing Julio:

Please bash on WCP2Blog, as why are you bashing on a blog where the guy doesn't even post?
Secondly, I have read all this "noise" you speak about and I'm pretty sure he never mentioned anything of that sort, it's your assumptions that you have made as you lack the intelligence to understand wit and humor.

Anonymous said...

Polish fans did NOT cheer against LAOS because we felt slighted by losing the semi-final. We had a former teammate in Brett Levis on the team and a friend of Poland in Jay Tomchuk. The fact that the Laos fans were calling us F*cking F*ggets in front of children didn't help either.